Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Perfection

I use to think that perfection was a state of mind but never a state of being. That every "picture perfect" moment had to be touched up here and there. But then I saw her smile...and reflected in it was mine, and right there my whole perception on perfection changed. See, perfection may be a state of mind but in her case it's a state of being. When the light from her soul alone shines so bright that it cast silhouettes of hope over these shadows of doubt....that's perfection. I use to think perfection was a state of mind but never a state of being because of these society made deceptions of the term perfection. The funny thing about society, it stereotypically pairs perfection with flawlessness together like niggas with watermelon and fried chicken. To me,  perfection is flawed. The definition of perfection is flawed none the less but to me, the being of perfection means it's not perfect at all. So is perfection just a state of mind? Or can it really be a state of being? The way I see it...beautiful flaws are perfection....perfection however, is just flawed.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Dilemma

I'm in love with two woman. One is always there for me when I need someone to lean on, to listen to me vent. The other knows exactly what to say to put a smile on my face. One of these woman have been my friend since birth, has always been around...while the other...on the other hand...I JUST barely found . The one I've known forever has taken so many twists and turns in her own life, has helped me thru every situation I've been in, I could definitely see her becoming my wife. But the one that just came into my life, she brings me so much joy, she gives out everything I've put in, she's my confidant, my "kindergarten crush" she's.....my best friend. I love the relationship that I have with both of these women, but I don't want one relationship to suffer because I focus more on the other. What do I do? My heart is telling me I can love them both the same at the same time, but I'm already getting both of their melodic ways confused with one another. I call them both by the wrong name because they're so much the same. Look, I know it's wrong to love them both in the same light and the same time...but you've got to understand....depending on the situation I try to favor one more, but then I focus on the other and the notion of devotion to the emotion that's provoked makes me change my mind. Is it really a crime? That I love these women the same? My heart won't allow me to choose between the two...and between me and you...I don't wanna! So I guess I'll just keep music as my bitch and poetry as my mistress and call it a day.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

National Poetry Day (Heroes/Heroines)

In honor of National Poetry Day, I decided to dedicate my heroes/heroine poem to my mother!

19 years of back talking, door slamming, late night creeps and near death experiences BUT your love remains unconditional. 19 years of bad decisions and disagreements but you love me just the same. As far back as I can remember, it's always been you and me. No father to help raise me, no MAN to claim glory at the end of my victory. See, he might have been in the audience that evening but as I reached for my diploma, as I my mind went back to sleepless night with you helping with homework and late night projects, I dedicated that moment to you. Yeah, it's always been the two of us. You taught me how to ride a bike, and taught me how to be strong, you taught me how I didn't need a father that society was wrong. You taught me how to hold my head high, even when I felt like putting it down, you taught me that nothing is more discouraging then always wearing a frown. You taught me that it's ok to cry when my soul needs a little relief, but as I sit writing this poem, I'm still in disbelieve. You have never judged me for anything or made me feel incomplete, you've always put me on a pedestal and made me an elite. Every award ceremony, every band and choir concert, I could hear you yelling "that's my baby" a little louder then the other parents. It was apparent that you were proud of me. As I sit and think back on all the times I made you mad, I made you cry, every time I yelled at you or made you feel insubordinate to me tears come to my eyes. See, 19 years of immaturity has let to 19 years of growth, and with that growth come the knowledge that you loved and cherished me so much that you sacrificed the life you had planned for yourself,  just so I could live the one I had planned for me. Every Mother's Day I always get you two gifts, because you took on the role of two parents, to every one of your kids. You have equipped me with everything I need to survive in this world, so now it's time for me to make something of myself so I can return unselfish gesture you showed to me. Dear Mom, I don't tell you this enough but I love you. And I am so appreciative of everything that you have done, that you're doing, and the things you plan to do for me. None of your efforts have gone unnoticed and none of your sacrifices have gone unrecorded. Your heart is pure gold and your soul reflects nothing but positive intentions for the well-being of us all. I thank you from every inch of my heart and every ounce of my soul for everything you have ever done for me. I LOVE YOU MOM! Sincerely, One Grateful Daughter.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Justice?

.."and just for all!" or is it just for some. It's hard to believe that it's for everyone. The color of your skin is all that ever matters, not the crime, not the death toll not the evidence that's gathered. Innocent until proven guilty is just something that sounds good, cuz you get caught with ANYTHING, you go to jail in my hood. Stealing diapers for your child to avoid a nasty rash, will get a black women more time then an old white man smuggling cash. A black man can fuck up once and lose his entire life, when a white person is innocent holding the bloody knife. Let a black man kill two white girls, and they'll inject his ass so fast...but let a white man kill both of my cousins and they give his ass a free pass. Even with all his priors he still getting out, but first time black offenders, they in for good without a doubt. Justice for all my ass, it should be justice for some...it seems like judges like punishing black people for fun. A white cop punches a black 15 year old girl in the face then sprays her with mace, it's all on tape but you think he got in trouble? Jena 6, Dunbar Village...it's all the same thing, they mess up once and get sentenced to life and treated like non human beings. So justice for all is unofficially revised to ONLY justice for some...but African American's in America look how far we've come. We use to not have any rights now we have "The right to remain silent" cuz ANYTHING we say not can but WILL be used against us in a court of law. But anything that gets caught on their dashboard cameras and evidence acquired from eyewitnesses is inadmissible...funny ain't it! Justice for all? It sounds real good, but you can only be a part of that "all" after you meet the right criteria.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Care: Just a four letter word.

Don't act like you care, don't stand here or right there and act like you care. When my heart drips drops of pains, uncertainties, falling from that organ like raw meat, flowing out of the windows to my soul like a sorrow's eye on it's way to dehydration, don't act like you care. When hatred is so thick around us that it causes this layer of humidity that makes your shirt stick to your back and the hair to the back of your neck, don't act like you care. When you try to hide your imperfection to give the illusion of perfection by sweeping your flaws under your neighbor's doormat, and some unsuspecting, never guessing victim trips not over their own faults and flaws but yours, don't act like you care. When you find it necessary to blow out someone else candle to make yours burn bright have them wondering around in darkness, when they stub their toe on the now everlasting overcasting shadows of life, don't act like you care. People who care have real eyes.  Real eyes that recognize real lies? So I guess they see the hoe with the loose pussy pretend to be saved, or the pastor in the pulpit with his crack addition craves, leaders of our country pretending to care, but they don't, those sicks fucks and here you sit unaware. They say real eyes realize real lies but sometimes the pupils compromise. They see what they want to not what they need to, believe what they can't do, things that are untrue. I'm tired of you fake assholes and out of control hoes pretending like you care. You break someones heart til they hit despair, then break their spirits to that point beyond repair. In a world full of negativity a suicidal thought is the only positivity. The only answer some people see to there never ending questions, cause you refused to care, give them simple conversation. If people really cared, "hate" wouldn't have more power then "love" and every last things that I mentioned above, would be a figment of my imagination and taken care of. Instead of feeling completed, we leave each other depleted, all because we refuse to care. Care, it's just a four letter word...like hope, love, fate...we as a people are so closed minded that we refuse to open our minds to the idea that maybe, just maybe if we cared a little more, black men wouldn't die before 21, people would stop glorifying the hood, and drug dealers, the dream killers wouldn't be our kids' fathers. ...if we cared a little more.

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